Just a quick post tonight

Hello all

Just a quick update to say that I am doing well and that I am having a good weekend so far! Margaret is here, Cathryn was here and she just left a few minutes ago and Sarah is visiting again tomorrow!

I'm healing little by little, I just bought Anthony Bourdain's book "Kitchen Confidential" to read (it's really good so far and I'm only 20 pages in or so) and I'm cross-stitching like a fiend. I also got some cool word search/coloring books from Margaret and Nerissa and I'm excited to break those in, too!

That's all for now folks, have a good one!

B

This is what my insides look like....kind of.

Hullo dear readers

I had two doctor's appointments this week.
Yesterday was with the Trauma specialists at MHMC, they told me that:
--my incisions look like they're healing well
--my cracked ribs will be sore for months, that is normal
--they took xrays of all of my broken parts and mentioned that my collarbone may need surgery because the broken piece had moved further away from its original spot
Today I saw my Orthopaedic Surgeon who told me:
--my pelvis is healing as expected. I am going back on May 31st and we will see about getting me walking on that leg
--my collarbone has indeed moved, but it will still heal ok. I may have a slight bump on my right shoulder, but that's all. I will take that in lieu of a scar & surgery
--I have to keep on the blood thinning shots for another month
--I don't have all of the hip precautions that I did when I left the hospital, I just need to make sure I'm resting my right leg and not actively trying to lift my hip
--The funny feeling on the top of my right thigh will probably lessen if not go away completely, but the numbness on my outer right thigh may very well stay that way forever.
Here are some photos to show you all kind of how things look inside my pelvis. THIS IS NOT MY XRAY. I FOUND THIS XRAY ON GOOGLE.COM.

I put this image that I found into MS Paint and drew a rough estimate that shows where my "hardware" is. It's bigger than it looks on here and the surgeon referred to it as "major surgery". He said to me:
Dr.: "You did a number on your pelvis"
Me: "Well, **I** didn't do anything to my pelvis, so to speak."
Dr.: "*laughs* Of course not, but, I think you know what I meant."
What I can't show you on here (because I don't remember from my xray that I saw) where exactly all the cracks were. There was also something that went around to the back, like where my butt is, but I can't show you that, either. Sorry!

This image represents where my scars are from the surgery.

The dark line on top extends from my right side "love handle" all the way across my lower belly and ends about 3" below my belly button. The whole thing is probably about 1' long. That's where they had to cut me open to fix my pelvis. The other, smaller, dark line is the incision that they made on the side of my right thigh that is about 3" long. I'm not sure why they made that one, but, it's there.

So, if you wanted to know more, now you do! If you didn't.....maybe you skimmed this entry? Or didn't read it at all? If you read, thanks for reading! If you didn't...well...you didn't get this far.

B

The benefits of being in a car accident

What a weird title right?

What it means is that I am always trying to find the big positives and silver linings since my accident. Here's what I've come up with so far:

-- I estimate that I've lost around 20lbs or so and I am super motivated to keep increasing that number and keeping healthier eating habits.
-- Because I am at a bigger risk for early-onset arthritis I am determined to work out daily, or at least every other day (once I am fully healed), to prevent this from happening.
-- If this accident hadn't happened I would be working at Cain Park this summer which would have been really awesome, don't get me wrong, but now if I get hired on a cruise ship I could probably start sometime late July or August, depending on my health.
-- I will be able to go on my little weekend family vacation in June ( I would have had to work before).

Those are the biggest things for now. I will write more as I come up with them!
I had a fabulous weekend with Daniella, we did a lot of sitting around while I did needlepoint (don't judge) and she studied for her final. We also took a trip to the mall with my mom and my sister and they wheeled me around and I got a couple of really cute tops from Torrid and some super comfy PJ pants on sale from Macy's. Mission shopping trip was a success!

I am looking forward to another fabulous weekend with Margaret this week! =)

B

Insurance companies, Doctors and Detectives, oh my!

I am not going to say much about any of the entities named in the title of this blog entry, but I will say that my phone has never rang this much in my whole life I don't think. Same thing goes for my mom's phone. Oy!


A few morsels of good news: I had a great 1st of 3 possible interviews to potentially work for Royal Caribbean Cruise Line! How awesome would that be?!?!?!?!?! Here's hoping it works out!!! =D

Also: Daniella is coming to visit me for the weekend. SO. Excited!

Finally: My favorite author is going to send me a copy of one of her books! Long story but she blogged about how she has all these copies of her books that she was planning on giving away and I commented and told her that I lent my copy of her book to someone and never got it back and never bought a new one because I didn't want the new cover art (my copy had had the original cover art). So I opened my email this morning and had an email from her saying she would "LOVE" to send me one of the books!! SQUEE! I hope she autographs it =D

I know, I know, this entry was short but I'm not feeling too inspired at the moment. Sorry beloved ones! Stay tuned for more!

B

Hope

Yesterday was a not-so-good day. My pain seemed greater than usual, even though nothing was different about my pain medications, and I had a small migraine that I couldn't do anything about because taking Excedrin would mess with all of my other medications. Later on, my mom stretched out my bad leg for me and that helped my discomfort and I took some more medications and around 9pm or so I finally felt a lot better.

I woke up this morning and I said to myself "You're going to have ups and downs, good days and bad ones, you just need to accept this, do the best you can, and move along." Then I was thinking about the word "Hope", and most of you won't know the significance of that word in my life, but read on and I will share it with you. I need to hope more, and believe more, that this did happen for a reason and that even though that reason isn't apparent to me now, it will be some day.

Ironically, this afternoon I received a Get Well card from my Aunt Sandy and Uncle Bob, and in that card my Aunt Sandy quoted the very source, the very reason as to why "Hope" is such an important word in my life....allow me to explain.

Many many years ago, a gentleman named Thomas Lanahan and a lady named Hope Kittelsen went on their first date to a local Chinese restaurant. The date was going very well, they were totally hitting it off, and eventually the time came for them to open and eat their fortune cookies. Hope opened hers, her fortune was nothing of consequence, and ate her cookie. But Tom, he cracked opened his cookie, read his fortune, and a huge grin formed on his face. He looked up at Hope and read to her the writing on that small piece of paper:

"He who has hope has everything."

To make a long story short, Tom and Hope were never apart after that, at least not in their hearts. Tom went off to fight in World War 2 and came back a decorated hero, and they were married, I think around 1944, and they were together for 60 years until Hope died of cancer in September 2004 and Tom followed her a few years later in December 2007.

Tom and Hope were my grandparents, in case you haven't figured that one out, and while I don't have a lot of memories of them, my most vivid memory is of my grandpa pulling out his wallet one summer when I was visiting them in New York, I was probably 9 or 10 years old, and showing me the fortune and telling me his story. He kept the Hope fortune in his wallet from their first date to the day he died in 2007. I now have that fortune, which he made into a little collage with two pictures of my grandmother, framed and in my bedroom.

Anyways---the whole point that I am trying to make here is that hope is essential, and I intend to stock up on it and to never run out.

B

Shopping adventure

Day one of at-home care looks like this so far:

8am--Wake up (not really feeling like PDiddy, though). Get pain meds, blood thinner shot, and other misc. meds that have been prescribed for me. Lay around in bed for awhile trying to wake up.
8:30m-- Breakfast with mom. This morning it was Honey Nut Cheerios, yum yum yum.
9am-- Do my physical therapy exercises, with some super-sweet iPod jams in the background. Nothing like flexing your ankles to the beat of the GLEE version of "Kiss". (Don't judge me.)
10am-- Get dressed.
10:45am-- Roll into the living room, wait for mom to shower and get dressed herself.
11:30am--Pack up the car with me and my equipment and head out to run errands.

Today during errands, we acquired: a handicap sticker for my mom's car (we get rockstar parking now), a loofah sponge on a stick (so I can more easily wash myself), a lapdesk (so my computer can sit on my lap while I'm in bed and not overheat), Tylenol PM (hopefully to help me stay asleep through the night) and a "Thank You" card for my nurses from the hospital (self-explanatory). We also got my glasses adjusted, yay!

I'm sure you were all fascinated by that story. I know it was quite riveting and filled with action, intrigue, romance and plot twists. :P

I shall probably write again later and give you something more profound to chew on, but for now, Sarah is here so I'm going to go hang out with her!

B

There's no place like home

Well, everyone, it's official: I am home! I am right now snuggled up in my new bedroom on the main floor, in my beautiful yellow sheets, having had a shower, a nice meal provided by a neighbor, and tried out my wheelchair & walker around the house. Getting around is going to be hard work but essentially that's a good thing, it's basically like it's more physical therapy which is good for me, just exhausting!!

Oh, and just in case you're curious, this is basically what my walker looks like. It has the handle in the middle (only my middle handle is faced towards the left) so that it can be moved with just one hand while maintaining balance on the floor. It's called a stroke walker I think because it's designed for people who can't use one side of their body to move themselves around. Basically how I move is I let my right leg and arm hang there like dead chickens and I hold the center pole with my left hand and I move the walker forward a little, then I hop forward on my left leg. Rinse. Repeat. Hence: I get very tired very fast. BUT at least it means I can move.

I could post a picture of my wheelchair but it's pretty much a standard wheelchair so you all know what that looks like I would hope!

My new schedule is going to have me getting up early and getting to bed early like an adult, it's going to be so weird! But we will adapt. A lot of adaptations are coming my way, but luckily I have a tremendous support system to help me out!

So, now it's bedtime. More tomorrow!

B

Then, they told me I could go home

Well, folks, it's been an interesting few days.

I've been kicking Physical Therapy's booty and I've been doing really well. I am getting stronger every day and my therapists are all very pleased with where I am. SO pleased, in fact, that they told the doctors that they were ok with me going home and just doing my own therapy sessions at home so I am going home tomorrow (Wednesday) April 13th! We are quite pleased about this!

I can't imagine how people deal with being in the hospital for long periods of time. I have been in here for 10 days, I've been poked, prodded, questioned, moved, shimmied, lifted, cut open, injected, fed, trained...the list goes on....and I am so tired of it all already. I hear about these people who have been here since early March, and of course there are people who stay in hospitals much longer, and I am just amazed. Kudos to those people, I think I had it rough but they're the ones who really have it bad.

I also need to give acknowledgment to my friends and family. I would be an absolute wreck if it weren't for my friends and family who have loved me and supported me through this. There's a woman on my floor whose family lives far enough away that they can't come see her, but they also didn't send her any flowers or cards or anything. Her story goes that she was at home and someone tried to break in her house, so she fled and went to a shelter the next day. That night her apartment was indeed broken in to, but luckily she had already gone. Sadly, she ended up having a stroke and she needed to come to the hospital for care--she couldn't speak for some time, her right arm lost all feeling, and the right side of her face drooped, as is common with strokes. Now, she can talk ok and her arm has regained most feeling but she still needs a lot of therapy, she's in her 40s I believe. But, she has nobody here to come see her and send her love, so Sunday when it was nice out my mom, stepdad and I were going outside and we brought her along with us, and the following day my mom gave her some flowers. It's little things like this that we, as people, need to really appreciate. Appreciate the small acts of kindness, give them as much as you can, and make sure that you love people and that you thank the people that love you.


So, thank you, to all of you that love me. All of you who have been here for me showering me with your kindnesses, the cards, the emails, the Facebook posts, the flowers, the texts, the phone calls--nothing has gone unnoticed and unappreciated. I say this a lot, but, I really mean it when I do--I am a lucky, lucky girl.

Today I also received my wheelchair and my walker to take home with me tomorrow! Tomorrow morning I will go down to physical therapy and they will make sure that everything is good to go and that they brought me the right stuff and then I think I'll be able to leave!

I also had a nursing student hanging out with me all morning and she has to write up a report/paper type thing on me and I wanted to be like "Send me a copy!". She also asked if I thought I was going to have psychological trauma problems when I left the hospital,( i.e. nightmares, fears of getting in a car, etc). I told her I wasn't sure 100% yet, but that I would probably be nervous driving at night for awhile, but luckily (I guess) I won't be out at night much for awhile anyways.

Ok folks, that's all I've got the energy for tonight. Stay tuned for more!

B

P.S--I did see my x-rays the other day: intense!! I have a titanium plate in my pelvis and a string of metal and screws that kind of looks like a bicycle chain with screws sticking out of it. I don't know how it all works together but, hey, point is, it does!

Next, there was Rehab and bad hospital food

Once my surgery happened I was moved to the 11th floor for a couple days where I didn't do much but lay there and push the button for my pain meds. That's right, I'm a lucky kid that they hooked up to one of those controlled machines that you just push a button and it gives you a dose of the pain meds you're on. Best. Thing. Ever.

After a few days of that I was finally moved to my new digs in the Rehab unit--7C to be specific. I am actually on the stroke rehab unit but they deal with Ortho patients sometimes, too. That just means I am the youngest person on the floor by at least 15 years, probably 20.

I started my Physical therapy on Thursday April 7th and it's going to be a lot of work but it's all going to be worth it of course. I hope to be out of the hospital and on my way home by next week!

Now, things I've learned so far during my lengthy hospital stay:
#1- Nurses have to deal with a lot of crap (literally and metaphorically) and I don't think they are thanked often enough. Thank you, Nurses, for all that you do.
#2- There is definitely a "Scrub Heirarchy" as far as who gets to wear what colors. This is very fascinating to me.
#3- Having a remote that doesn't let you go backwards in TV channels is really annoying.
#4- Most of the people here at MHMC don't understand that difference between Playhouse Square and The Cleveland Play House. I forgive them, but, **sigh**.
#5- Hospital food is really really not very good.
#6- I do get to take home my super-sweet MHMC water bottle. Win!
#7- I keep my room at a nice 60* and it's excellent.
#8- When you're in the hospital and you're as disabled as I am, all independence goes out the window as well as all modesty.
#9- It's so bizarre to shower sitting down, also to have someone have to help you.
#10- The Game Show Network has some crazy weird game shows.
#11- There must be some code that says that Physical Therapy doctors and male Physical therapists must be attractive because I have yet to find an exception to this.

Also, tomorrow I am determined to see my xrays from Pre and Post Op.

B

First, there was a car crash

Greetings. I have decided to make a blog because I will be spending a lot of time in the hospital and I need something to do!

I figured most people that are reading this know why I am in the hospital, but if you just happened to tune in, here's what happened (caution: details may be very graphic):

My friend Sarah and I were in Cleveland driving back to pick up my car from where we work when we crossed through an intersection and we were hit by a drunk driver who ran his red light. He was going very fast and he didn't seem to slow down at all before "T-boning" us on the passenger side (aka my side). Our car went flying to the other side of the road and almost into a brick building, lucky for us the car had both front and side airbags or we would have been a lot worse off.

I didn't pass out at all during the entire incident. I saw his silver-white car approach us from the right and had enough time to take a breath in, I might have screamed, I don't recall, before the impact. I felt the car lurch to the left, just as the airbags deployed, hitting me in the face and neck at a crazy speed.The noise was deafening and it seemed like forever before we stopped, when I'm sure it was only a few moments, and I had my eyes closed the whole time but I remember thinking "Oh my gosh, oh my gosh!"....

When the car stopped and I opened my eyes I took in my surroundings. The car's windshield was badly cracked and the smell of steam, smoke and burnt rubber poisoned my lungs. The airbags blocked my view of most of the outside of the car and I saw that my door had been crunched in and was touching my right leg, which was on fire with pain. I heard Sarah calling my name and I managed to suck up enough air to tell her I was alive, and I heard witnesses around the outside of the car calling in asking if I was ok, but I couldn't breathe enough to reply to everyone.

I focused on keeping my breathing steady, as difficult as that was to do, and I began testing parts of my body to see if they would work. Wiggle my left fingers, check. Wiggle my toes, check. Move my left elbow and shoulder, check. Lift my left leg, check (with some difficulty). Then I tried to move my right shoulder and pain flushed through my body like a tidal wave, and I couldn't will my right leg to move at all. The only part of my body that I didn't try to move at all was my neck, I had seen enough movies to know never to try to move your neck after a trauma.

The shouting on the outside of the car continued for what seems like hours, Sarah called my mother to tell her what had happened, and then the ambulances showed up, their wailing sirens bringing me both relief and fear. An EMT climbed into the back of the car and clamped me into a neck brace, explaining that they needed to cover me up and cut off the car door to get me out. Conversation resume:

EMT: "Okay darling, I'm gonna put this fireman's coat on you to protect you, sorry it smells like smoke."
Me: "It's ok, I can't smell well right now."
EMT: "You're gonna hear a lot of noise because we have to cut open the car to get you out, but I promise you're not going to get hurt it will just sound loud."
Me: "Ok..."

So once they got me out onto a board, and I was screaming with pain, they managed to wheel me over to the ambulance. The rest of these events are kind of a blur because I was so focused on the pain but highlights:
**they had to cut off all of my clothing to examine my body so say g'bye to my: cargo crew pants (*sad*), long-sleeved Wicked t-shirt from 2006 (*very sad*) and my black Old Navy winter pea coat (*sad sad*).
**the EMTs were trying to make me feel better by making me laugh which didn't help because my ribs were cracked. But they were having a "Who is prettier" argument which I ended when they got me to the hospital and I said to them "You're both pretty. It's ok."
**Being moved when you have a lot of broken bones REALLY REALLY sucks.

So after about 5 hours of tests at the hospital, and lots of excruciating pain, I spent one night in the ICU under constant supervision. My injuries were thus:
**Right Collarbone: broken
**Right Rib #s 1-7: cracked
**Right Pelvis & Hip: broken in several places
**Small puncture in right Lung
**Small laceration in Liver

I had surgery on Monday April 4th to repair the Pelvis & Hip, and I now have a titanium plate in there and some screws, also. I will have to do a lot of Physical Therapy, and I also won't be able to put weight on my right leg for at least a few months.

Here's to being alive and to recovering. On y va!

B